Growing up, my parents never set a time requirement for thank you note writing after a birthday – they left it up to me. I could take as long as I wanted to write my thank you notes, but I couldn’t use the item until the thank you note had been written. The sneaky little rule was *brilliant*, now that I look back on it. Obviously, like any other kid, I wanted to use the fun stuff, so I wrote my thank you notes right away! Fast forward to my thirties, and I’m still someone who sends a handwritten note for just about everything. My take on it is that if someone went out of her way to do something nice for you, a note of gratitude is always appropriate. Writing your wedding thank you notes is commonly viewed as a chore. Being gracious shouldn’t be a pain; remind yourself how thankful you are for your loved ones’ thoughtfulness and generosity!
In this blog, I’ll go through my tried and true outline for writing heartfelt wedding thank you notes. This same formula works for non-wedding thank yous, too!
Before you get started
Grab your supplies! It’s much easier to tackle this project when you’ve got everything you need. Here’s what you should have on hand:
- Wedding gifts list: We kept track of our gifts as an added column in our address list for the big day. If you kept these separate, just snag that sheet – but you’ll need names and addresses, so if you need that, pull up the list from your invitations, too.
- Pen: duh.
- Stamps: It’s easier to just affix postage while you’re in “assembly line” mode than having to do it at a separate moment.
- Thank you notes and envelopes: reach out (leah@leahemoss.com) if you need help with this part!
Set a timer. I’d set aside one hour for this in chunks. Better to get as many done as you can in a set amount of time without driving yourself bonkers trying to write wedding thank you notes until the end of time.
Now you can get started!
Step 1: Directly mention the gift
Be specific here. You want to reference exactly what the person got you, whether that’s a physical item or a monetary gift. For an item, comment on where you’ve put it, how often you’re using it, or how it’s benefitted your life now that you have it. If the person gave cash, comment on what you plan to use their gift for. Again, specificity is key here!
Example A:
Dear Aunt Jane,
Thank you so much for the amazing chef’s knife you got us for our wedding. We’ve been using it all the time, and it’s incredible how much faster we’ve gotten at chopping – sudden stir fry experts over here! [CONTINUED IN STEP 2]
Example B:
Dear Uncle John,
Thank you so much for the generous gift you sent in honor of our wedding. It means so much to us and will be immensely helpful as we save toward the purchase of our first home together. [CONTINUED IN STEP 2]
Step 2: Attendance
Include your gratitude for their presence at your wedding. If the person traveled from outside the metro area, ensure you’ve acknowledged that they made the trip to be there. Regardless, someone’s effort to join in your celebration is worth noting. If the gift-giver didn’t attend, it’s nice to mention that you missed them.
Example A:
Dear Aunt Jane,
Thank you so much for the amazing chef’s knife you got us for our wedding. We’ve been using it all the time, and it’s incredible how much faster we’ve gotten at chopping – sudden stir fry experts over here! More than anything, we’re so grateful you made the trip all the way from Ohio to celebrate alongside us at our wedding. It means the world to us that you were there! [CONTINUED IN STEP 3]
Example B:
Dear Uncle John,
Thank you so much for the generous gift you sent in honor of our wedding. It means so much to us and will be immensely helpful as we save toward the purchase of our first home together. We’re sorry you weren’t able to join us for the wedding – please know you were missed. [CONTINUED IN STEP 3]
Step 3: Something personal adds a nice touch to your wedding thank you notes
Close it out with a nod to your relationship, upcoming plans, or another milestone. If this isn’t someone you’re close to, that’s ok – try and incorporate something about the relationship of how you know the person, such as “my dad is so lucky to have you as a close friend – thanks again.”
Example A:
Dear Aunt Jane,
Thank you so much for the amazing chef’s knife you got us for our wedding. We’ve been using it all the time, and it’s incredible how much faster we’ve gotten at chopping – sudden stir fry experts over here! More than anything, we’re so grateful you made the trip all the way from Ohio to celebrate alongside us at our wedding. It means the world to us that you were there! Looking forward to our visit in the fall – can’t wait to see you and the kids soon.
Thanks again,
Leah and Adam
Example B:
Dear Uncle John,
Thank you so much for the generous gift you sent in honor of our wedding. It means so much to us and will be immensely helpful as we save toward the purchase of our first home together. We’re sorry you weren’t able to join us for the wedding – please know you were missed. Once we do buy this house, plan on a phone call from us… you know we’ll have a million questions and your building expertise will definitely come in handy!
xoxo
The New Mr. and Mrs. Sachs
So there you have it – my 3 easy steps to writing heartfelt wedding thank you notes. To summarize, here they are:
- The item – Directly mention the gift – be specific
- Attendance – Include your gratitude for their presence
- Something personal
If you need help with the notes themselves, please reach out! I’d love to help you with your wedding thank you notes, or even personal stationery to have on hand. Showing your gratitude should be easy – and it should be beautiful.
As a reminder, you can get personalized stationery from me and I’ll be donating 20% of your purchase to get much-needed PPE for a local hospital, until April 30, 2020. You can have the card say whatever you’d like:
- For a couple: Mr. and Mrs. NewLastName, Jane and John NewLastName, Initials as monogram
- For an individual: name or monogram
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